Friday, March 16, 2007

Beyoncé and Shakira's day out

Honestly, these pop stars. You give them a day off and they just go off and record a smash hit single and a slinky video to go with it. Tsk.

Once again, for those of you too lazy to press play here is what you have missed:

00:00-00:20 Someone really needs to turn that kettle off.
00:20-00:23 Beyoncé's hips are ginormous. It's like she's got two frozen chickens stuffed up her.
00:26-00:28 Ouch! Shakira has dislocated her shoulder in a nonsensical tribute Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon. Except Shak's not in a straightjacket, but a really hot dress. (Try not to let the image of Mel Gibson in a really hot dress give you nightmares, readers).
00:50-01:00 What kind of person puts curtains up at the beach?
01:05-01:10 Beyoncé is wearing Shakira's wig.
01:11-01:20 Now Shakira is wearing Beyoncé's wig! What kind of follicular madness is this?
01:20-01:30 Are we in a pole dancing club, a hall of mirrors, or a mixture both? Whatever, it's right kinky.
02:04-02:20 Girls, if you're going to writhe around on the floor like children, at least put on some comfortable clothes. Those dresses will cost a fortune at the dry cleaners.
02:58-02:10 All that steam from the kettle has set off the sprinklers. I told you so.
03:08-03:12 When Shakira sings "we can laugh about it", it cuts to a picture of B and S (as they shall henceforth be known) doing a laugh. The director has earned his multi-million dollar fee and we can all go home.

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