Friday, December 1, 2006

You have to understand why it's so great

Earlier this week, I referred to Peter Andre and Jordan's record as the sound of two squirrels fighting in a tin bucket. I was wrong.

How do I know? The reviewers at Amazon told me. Here is what they say.

When I learned of the making of this album, I had a very predictable reaction. "Eurgh!" I thought, and spewed coffee onto my keyboard, which has never been quite the same since. "This album will surely be appalling."

Readers, do not be taken in as I was. Hearing it by chance, I can now affirm that "A Whole New World" is indeed what it suggests. Yes, it is literally a whole new world - and not one of unimaginable pain and impressively talentless airheads, but a beautiful, faintly arousing one.

When you hear great music you have to understand why it's so great. When you hear Jordan and Peter together, you understand immediately what they're about. This isn't about the money, this isnt about the mass of press and media attention that will be lavished upon them, this isn't a cash in on their, supposedly, fading star capabilities. Anyone who believes that is clearly a paedophile. No, this is about two people who love each other very much and want to tell you a love story at the low, low price of £8.99.
MR MD Evans

I first heard this album while out walking my pet crocodile and felt a sudden urge to sink to my knees and thank the Lord above that at last someone had come along to rescue me from the hell of modern music. Katie Price has the voice of a glamour model with a London accent, when she sings you can almost hear her. Peter Andre is an Adonis of a man. When he sings, cats dance and plaster falls from the walls. His Greek/Antipodean roots bring out the earthy soul in his velvety tones that only a bartender or chain smoker can usually render. This is the best album ever made and you bloody know it.
Simply The Pest

History has traditionally provided the ingredients, but it always took a bit of je ne sait quoi to put them together in way that fits the ear-hole like a glove. In the melting pot of the south in America, the black population drew on ingredients from Irihs music, jewish music, carribean music and elsewhere to produce the musical language of communication called JAZZ. But presenting the right ingredients doesn't always mean you'll create the right product. What if, for example, cake and cheese came together to form Cake Cheese in instead of Cheesecake?

Elements of chance and elements of magic will always be required to create something beautiful from its components, so how much of this must have been needed to create something musically beautiful when combining the talents of a glamour girl and muscle man? On the face of it, lots, it would seem. But A Whole New World has done just that.

It's not perfect. In fact, it could be a lot better. But it's the foundation stone upon which a new human emotion will be built.
Fatty Fatty Aeroplanes

I have heard the phrase "voice of an angel" many times and now I can truly, hand on heart, say that I too have been blessed with this aural pleasure. I have just listened to this at work and I am frankly having difficulty writing this review, as the screen is slightly blurry due to the tears of joy I have wept. A torrent of salty rivers, which signal my approval of the talents of Katie and Peter. I look forward with eager anticipation to future releases from the new double act that has Britain entrapped within its spell, as a spider has entrapped a fly.

It is touching that people can see behind the tabloid facade and appreciate Jordan and Peter's album for the sublime masterpiece it is. I wish them well.

  • Read all the reviews on Amazon
  • Thanks to Jon C at Not BBC for alerting me!
  • Labels: , ,

    << Home

    Newer Posts ::: Older Posts

    © 2014 Discopop Directory | Contact | Go to the homepage