Monday, April 4, 2005

Big Mistake

The royalties for "Torn" just don't pay like they used to, and Thames water have cut the supply to Natalie Imbruglia's house.

That's the only reasonable explanation for the state of Nat's hair. Don't L'oreal do conditioner any more?

Luckily, her fine new album is in your shops today (and heavily discounted everywhere, for some reason). It's your duty to buy it before Mrs Dan Silverchair turns into Howard from Take That.

Meanwhile, take a look at this picture on the left. What on earth is going on there? The hair's a bit better, but someone's sandpapered the poor woman's cheeks off! It's so bad, her breasts have decided to escape.

Memo to Natalie: I've got some shampoo, a pair of scissors and some free time. Give me a call before Top of the Pops.

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